Why Use Mediation instead of Court?

mediationinsteadofcourt

Why choose mediation over Court?

New clients ask me what is the benefit of mediation for a divorce? This blog answers this question. But more importantly, I hope after reading this you will be encouraged to try this new approach to divorce or separation. In doing so, you and your partner may be able to close this chapter in your lives with acceptance and a sense of fairness. You will then be able to start your next chapter with your self esteem and mutual respect intact.

Mediation offers a number of benefits that the courts due to their structure cannot.
1. You decide the outcome. With court a Judge will decide for you and his/her decision is final. In mediation you will with the help of a trained mediator learn to decide the best outcome for all parties involved.
2. Cut your costs dramatically. Even if you decide to to…

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Why Use Mediation instead of Court?

Why choose mediation over Court?

New clients ask me what is the benefit of mediation for a divorce? This blog answers this question. But more importantly, I hope after reading this you will be encouraged to try this new approach to divorce or separation. In doing so, you and your partner may be able to close this chapter in your lives with acceptance and a sense of fairness. You will then be able to start your next chapter with your self esteem and mutual respect intact.

Mediation offers a number of benefits that the courts due to their structure cannot.
1. You decide the outcome. With court a Judge will decide for you and his/her decision is final. In mediation you will with the help of a trained mediator learn to decide the best outcome for all parties involved.
2. Cut your costs dramatically. Even if you decide to to your own diy divorce you will still incur considerable costs for attending court each occasion.
3. Protect your children from the pain of parental conflicts. At mediation instead of court we offer clients our unique parenting plan as drafted by several lawyers and mediators with extensive experience. This deals with all issues that will concern your child in the future.
4. Maintain your privacy. Mediation is confidential.
5. You can still use the court system if mediation does not work out. Even if proceedings have already been initiated, you can try mediation to see if it is for you. The only criteria is that you suspend your proceedings pending the outcome of mediation.
It is very important that both parties want to resolve matters. It is not necessary for either of you to know the solution at the outset your mediator has been trained to help you explore options. You need to think about the process and what you would like out of it.
Mediation is a form of dispute resolution. It is less expensive than litigation as stated above. This is due to in part the fact that it is less time consuming than having solicitors send letters, make phone calls, and barristers argue legal points before a judge. One couple who cam to me a couple of years ago came to me after having spent €20,000 in legal fees already. They could not believe how much money they could have saved if they had commenced the process sooner.
For most couples I see my fee is reduced even further as they come to mediation before engaging in a legal battle. Once a couple becomes entangled in litigation, the cost of mediation is usually greater because they must first regain a working civil relationship in order to agree on the future of issues.
Even couples who don’t work out all issues in a mediation usually agree on many of them. That means fewer questions for their lawyers or the Judge to decide and therefore less conflict and less expense.
Most importantly, children benefit when they view their parents working cooperatively, they avoid destroying the family and set the stage for coparenting afterward. Parents who use a mediator also provide positive role models for their children. They demonstrate that adults can solve their problems by talking, listening, caring and collaborating instead of arguing without achieving anything.

In conclusion, mediation can provide an effective means of resolving a dispute. Of course the process is not for everyone. It wont work when one party feels unable to express their thoughts and feelings openly without fear. If one party has unreasonable demands that the other party give up their legal rights and wont meet in the middle. Of course your mediator is skiiled in helping you overcome these issues. Parties need to be open and honest for mediation to work. For most couples, mediation is a much sought after alternative to the traditional adversarial approach which divides rather that unites in order to find a mutually acceptable route forward.
About the Author:
Mary Claire McCarthy is an accredited full time mediator. Visit today for free mediation information http://www.mediationinsteadofcourt.ie/
She has extensive experience as a family lawyer (in Ireland and also qualified in UK & Wales) before becoming a full time mediator. She conducts several mediations per month and has a diploma in mediation as well as a law degree. She can travel to your local area to mediate. Please visit her website for information on a mediator http://www.mediationinsteadofcourt.ie Or phone 00353 8798 32 112. Email us: mediation@live.ie
You may republish this article in your website, newsletter or book, on the condition that you agree to leave the article author’s signature and all links completely intact.

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When is the best time to use mediation in a Separation or Divorce?

When is the right time to Mediate for Separation or Divorce

 

 

Of course mediation can help with reconciliation or helping couples learn new ways of communicating together.

Timing can be crucial to the success of mediation for separation or divorce. People going through a separation are often on an emotional roller coaster and changes can occur suddenly, with little warning.

Most often when couples do enter mediation, one party usually the one who initiated the separation or divorce may be further along the road than the other party for example has thought long and hard about this for a considerable length of time. However, the mediator will listen to both parties and help to assist both of them  in achieving what is best for each individual and will also listen to both concerns as and when they arise.

If either of you is not ready to at least talk about where you think matters stand with the other person in front of a professional mediator in confidence then perhaps wait a little longer in order to be more comfortable with that situation.

 Visit us at http://www.mediationinsteadofocourt.ie for further information 

How to Choose a Good Mediator

How to select a mediator or mediator qualifications

It is imperative that the mediator you choose is well qualified and experienced. At the moment in Ireland any person can call themselves a mediator. Thus, you need to set criteria for evaluating a mediator.
So ask your mediator if they are accredited and have insurance and a practising certificate. All of our mediators at http://www.mediationinsteadofcourt.ie are fully accredited and have a diploma in mediation as well as being solicitors.
They don’t give legal advice but you would have the benefit of their legal experience from practising as lawyers.
Many mediators will be happy to talk to you on the phone about their services.

How much experience does your mediator have?
This is crucial in trying to find a suitable mediator. I have been mediating for a number of years in a wide number of areas and am aware parties are placing trust and confidence in a me. I also worked in the courts as a solicitor so have represented clients and believe that in many cases mediation offers a better solution simply as the parties decide the outcome not someone else. Parties are informed that they can draw on my experience as a mediator in the courts though I dont give legal advice.  It is vital that you can rest assured of your mediator’s ability to assist you find a suitable outcome. So ask your mediator if they are experienced before you hire them. Ask them are they accredited and how many mediations have they done.
Eventhough, separation mediation and divorce mediation are rapidly growing areas you might find it hard to find a mediator in your locality. We serve all of Ireland and other areas upon request. We can travel to your local area to help you resolve your difficulties.

How would the Mediator deal with deadlock or stalemate in a mediation?
It is important that your mediator will give you and the other party enough room to explore your areas of disagreement and conflict thoroughly. This is necessary so that you don’t settle now for something that you might regret later or break down at some point in the future.

Gender of the mediator
If you both sense that you can trust the mediator and that he or she can help you both reach an agreement, then you have found the right mediator. If the process works for you, you will be able to look back on the mediation process as one of your accomplishments. With help from a third person, you have found a way together to separate or divorce or even reconcile.
In my experience, being a female I am keen to ensure the man feels at ease that he does not feel like my neutrality is compromised and indeed at the same time I need to be fair to both parties.
Cost
An experienced mediator knowledgeable about the law will charge more than one who is less qualified, but she or he will be more valuable to you and more efficient in conducting the mediation. You will benefit from their years of experience.

Retainers
Another aspect when choosing your mediator can be if they charge a retainer. While you will avoid the high retainers which solicitors require (usually a few thousand €). Because mediation costs less, mediators require smaller retainers if they require them at all. If your mediator does require a retainer be sure to get agreement that he or she will refund any unused portion to you both.

About the Author:
Mary Claire McCarthy is an accredited full time mediator. Visit today for free mediation information http://www.mediationinsteadofcourt.ie/

Mediation questions answered

Many ask me how does mediation services work?

Mediation services work by beginning with the assumption that the parties are willing to resolve their dispute at mediation through finding common ground with the help of a trained mediator.The parties are aware that they may not be able to resolve their issues by dealing directly with one another. Therefore, they seek a neutral third party (mediator) who will help them resolve their dispute.

The mediator uses various principles and helps parties explore their strengths and weaknesses acts as an intermediary and thus provides an objective point of view and assists in defusing the parties emotions.

The mediator helps the parties move from positions to interests and encourages and provides a platform for positive dialogue between the parties. This usually ends in a settlement of the dispute by way of a binding lasting agreement. 

What is mediation

HI ALL,

I will be posting information about mediation and how it can help parties overcome their dispute over the coming weeks. So here is a taster of what is to come.

What is mediation?

Mediation is a process that can be used instead of using the court system to resolve a dispute. It involves an independent third party who acts as a facilitator (assistant) between the parties to assist them to explore ways to resolve their differences and reach an agreement that best addresses their needs.

Be sure to visit our website at www.mediationinsteadofcourt.ie for more information. Or email us mediation@live.ie

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